This is not for you.

bring me your weary.

Ever feel like there is no one who will listen to you?

(guess what, you’re wrong)

I’ll listen.

So what’s stopping you from spilling it all?

Anonymous asked: I am involved in a (currently emotional-only) relationship with a woman that has a fiancé. They have been engaged for some time now but this seems to be on the verge of ending. The timing of my involvement could not be worse; the thought of ending a potential marriage is an awful one. At the same time I want to see this through to whatever conclusion it has. What in the world am I to do in this situation?

Let me start with saying a few things.
If this woman is involved with you emotionally and is engaged to be married, marriage might not be the best thing for her. Defiantly not right for the person she is going to marry. Things should never start that way. Honesty is key to a healthy relationship of any type.
Now moving on to timing.
Time is not real. We are always in the now. Never in yesterday or tomorrow, always today. So timing has little to do with feelings. You met, it happened at just the right time. If not, then perhaps feelings would be different.
You are not ending a potential marriage if the parties are not even married yet. You are not the only one making choices in the matter there are two parties involved in a relationship.
Now you say that you want to see this through, be it however it might end.
That is a brave answer, because things have a way of seeing the light.

Let me ask you this…
Do you love her? Not do you love her if she loves you. Do you love her if only. Would you love her if you could have her… none of that.
Just simply, do you love her?
Would you still love her even if she were married?

See, love is a funny thing.
Because it’s so one sided. We can never really know if someone actually loves us back. We can only love them, and hope for that love to mean something. But even if it doesn’t, would it matter? It shouldn’t, because love isn’t about us. It’s about how we feel about something/one else. It’s about how that feeling makes us remember we are alive.

I say if you want to do right by this, you need to be an honest man. Think long and hard about how you feel for this woman. Then choose, stay or walk away. If you stay, then you need to tell her what you want. NEVER BE THE SECOND CHOICE. Your heart is not a toy, just as hers is not. This would be a good time to point out that neither is the man who also is involved in this. His heart is not a toy either. I say you make your choice first, regardless of what the outcome might be, then you have her make hers.

Just know that your choice and her choice may be different.
And that is something that just is.
You will have to accept that.

All in all, take the lesson and grow.
Because you can only be in today.
Don’t make today living hell for everyone, in hopes for tomorrow.

May the fates be in your favor.